Heartbeat
by AnImaginaryFilm
Summary: Jake Muller wasn't expecting to fall as hard as he did when he started a relationship with Piers Nivans. Things get real complicated once Piers lets on that he wants to return to his ex. trying to forget his feelings, Jake turns to Sherry, but when Piers starts texting Jake again he can't resist.
1. Chapter 1: Text say That it's not fair

I was never the type to let shit get to me, well, at least shit like this. Usually I'd lash out in anger, but I found myself hurt instead. This was exactly what I tried to protect myself from. How could I have let him get under my skin, into my heart? How the fuck did that mutt become something to me? Why did I lie to myself? I can't even bring any blame on the guy. I knew damn well how he felt about Chris, yet I let myself go. Who was I to think that I could ever fully win his heart? _Such a fuckin' fool. _I stare into the mirror, and sigh. I'd let my hair grow long, it was strange. Running my fingers through it, trying to figure out how the hell to style it.

Pushing it from one side to the other, I decide just to comb it back. _I need to get this shit cut off, safety hazard. _It should be fairly easy to avoid running into the damn dog. He would be following his captain as usual now. I throw on my jacket and slide into my boots. It was fairly nice out, so I decide to take my bike.

"_Jake, this isn't really working out," Piers sighed, rubbing his hand over his face._

"_What are you sayin'?"_

_I get in his face._

"_All we do is fight."_

"_That's not true. C'mon, you know that's not true."_

_I grab him by the waist and pull him closer._

"_Stop."_

_He knocks my hands away, and steps back. I look away._

"_It's 'cause of Chris, ain't it? He comes back 'round, doin' his hero act and you're all for it, right?"_

_No answer. I nod my head._

"_Just say that then. Don't try to lie! Talkin' 'bout some imaginary problem with what we have, when in all honesty you wanna go and be his again. Well, if that's what you really want, Piers go!"_

"_Jake…"_

"_Go," I yell, pointing to the door._

_Tears well up in those hazel eyes, something I fought so hard against, now I was the reason. He walks out._

"_and don't try to play victim, Honey. You wanted this," I scream at him, then slam the door._

_I just can't keep my mouth shut._

The grocery store was busy around this time. _I knew I shoulda gotten up earlier to do this shit._ Well either way, it needed to be done. I was running low on provisions and I couldn't go starving myself. I hop off the bike and head inside. Grabbing a basket, I look around the isles a bit to pass time. Peanut butter, honey, apple jelly, all gets tossed into the basket, and move on to the next isle.

"Jake," I hear a cheerful voice call.

I turn around to look for the source.

"Oh my god, Jake your hair!"

The blond woman comes running up to me, her own basket swinging back and forth. It had been a while since I had seen Sherry Birkin. I smile.

"Super-girl, how've ya been?"

"Good. I can't believe you let it grow out."

Something about the look on her face made me question my decision to do so.

"Yeah , uh, Piers wanted to know how I'd look with it. Since I don't have pictures…"

I run my fingers through it.

"How is Piers? I heard he was back with the BSAA."

"Nah, you heard wrong. He's back with Chris, still not a soldier yet."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you guys broke up."

Sherry wasn't too good at hiding things, I could see right through her fake sympathy. She was probably relishing in what she would call 'fate' or 'destiny'. This was more 'cliché' in my opinion.

"Yeah, well, I could never fill Chris' whatever…"

I just didn't feel like talking about it anymore, anger replacing the hurt feeling.

"If he loved you like he said he did, you wouldn't have to measure up to anyone."

I look at her. The agent's words stung, and made me question Piers' feelings for me. At first I believed I wasn't enough, but what she said made me feel like I never was anything at all. Was I just a stand-in? A convenient replacement?

"Yeah…"

"I can't believe he would do something like that to you. I mean he knows how hard it is for you to trust and let someone in."

She was only making me feel worse. I wanted to tell her to shut up, but my mother raised me to never disrespect a woman.

"Can we switch topics, I already feel like shit," I grumble.

"Oh, sorry," she peeps.

We spend the rest of our shopping trip together, catching up on the other's lives. After we check out, I walk her to her Jetta.

"Maybe we can hang out sometime."

Her smile was kind of contagious. I nod.

"Yeah, just give me a call."

Waving, I walk to my bike and drive home. Tossing my bag and keys on the kitchen table, I was distracted by the vibration of my phone. A text from Piers, it reads;

_It's not fair._

_What are you talkin' 'bout?_

I respond.

_Can you come over?_

I read the message over and over. The fuck?

_You want me to come over to Chris' place. . . _I finally text back.

_He isn't here. We got into a big argument. Please._

I sigh, and pace back and forth. Running my fingers through my hair, I read the message one more time.

_I'm on my way._

Against my better judgment I snatch up my keys and hurry over to Chris' apartment. Parked in front of the building, I start to scold myself for being there. I almost start up the bike and go home, but Piers comes jogging over. My heart flutters. He hurries me inside. I feel like a kid sneaking into his girlfriend's house late at night. The door shuts and a sudden feeling of dread is born in the pit of my stomach. I shouldn't be here. Looking around, I have to keep from laughing, should have guess that Chris Redfield didn't have shit in his apartment. It was real simple, white walls, grey indoor/outdoor carpet, a grey couch, maple stained coffee table, matching TV stand, and TV. There was one lonely picture in a frame on the stand, I walk over and pick it up.

"That's Chris and his little sister, Claire. She is the one who saved Sherry from Raccoon City with Leon," he says over my shoulder.

I carefully put it down and sigh.

"Why the hell did you call me over here?"

He pulls my arm so I turn around. Leaning up on his toes, he plants a kiss on my lips sending a pain through my heart. He pulls away, but my eyes stay closed. He kisses me again, this time deeper, and nibbles on my bottom lip. I kiss back, taking him into my arms, laying him down on the couch, needy hands pulling off clothes. I shouldn't be doing this.

"It's in the bedroom," he pants.

Standing up, I make my way to the bedroom. I look around, the bed is unmade and a laundry basket over flowed in the corner. On the nightstand sat a bottle of lubricant. What the fuck am I doin'? Taking a deep breath I walk back out to the living room. I set the bottle on the coffee table as I sit back down, and he straddles my lap, pressing his lips against mine, arms draped over my shoulders. That doubtful feeling fades, replaced with old feelings and a need to feel him. I missed the fucker. He scoots back, tugging my boxer-briefs down to free my erection. Piers poured some of the lube into the palm of his hand and started to stroke my length. He then grabs my hand, and pours some into it. His lips meet mine again, as I finger his asshole. He moans and whimpers; his grip on my cock tighter now.

"I missed you so much, Jake," he whispers.

I move his hand away, and remove my fingers from his entrance. His breathing hitches as I ease him down on my cock. We fuck on Chris' couch until I cum inside of him, and he on my chest. I lie back as he retrieves a wet wash cloth to clean me off.

"Did you mean it," I finally speak up.

He stops what he is doing and puts the dirty rag on the table.

"I miss you every day. Things with Chris aren't the same and he absolutely hates that I was with you. While we were fighting he said he didn't even want to touch me anymore."

He couldn't even look at me, tears welling up in his hazel eyes.

"Then why are you still here?"

I grab his hands, trying to catch his gaze. He shakes his head.

"I shouldn't have asked you to come here. This was a mistake."

Piers pulls away from my grasps. I laugh, gathering my clothes.

"Right, we were just a mistake. Everythin'. All of it. Fuck you, Piers."

I throw the clothes on and storm out. He doesn't even come after me. I zoom home and jump in the shower. Wrapping a towel around my waist, I hear my phone ring.

"What," I answer.

"Oh, I'm sorry did I bother you," a small voice peeps over the line.

"No, I'm sorry, Super-Girl, I just got out the shower. What's up?"

"Well I wanted to know if you could come over to watch a movie or something."

"Sounds good, be there in twenty."

I knew where this was leading, but I needed to get my mind off of Piers. I hated being this weak. It was late and the temperature was cooler so I take my Challenger instead. The Weeknd's _Same Old Song_ blaring through the sound system. Not really the best choice of song, I skip through songs on my iPod, everyone coming up reminding me of the guy. _Fuckin' piece of shit, _wasn't sure if I was directing that to the thing or myself for a minute. I keep skipping through, finally something comes on that I can just vibe to; _The Longest Text Message_ by Childish Gambino.

A bitter and angry rap song about a shitty relationship, it matched my mood. Sherry lived in a nice high rise apartment further up north, and speeding down the expressway helped remedy some of my frustrations. I pulled into to her building's parking garage. I park in her guest spot. The doorman looked me over, the look on his face was asking for a beating, but I pushed the urge down.

"I'm here to see Sherry Birkin. She should be expectin' me," I say as nicely as I can, which isn't nice at all.

He scowls and picks up a phone receiver.

"Ms. Birkin, a _gentleman_ is here for you. Shall I send him in?"

This snot nosed motherfucker was just askin' for it. He hangs up and glares at me again.

"You gonna buzz me in or what, Jingles?"

He does just that and I walk in. The place's lobby looked like what I imagined a high end hotel's would look like, and the elevator walls were covered with mirrors. I grin at the thought of what could be done in here. When I reach her floor, I make my way to her apartment. She answers the door in a low cut white top, no bra, and grey yoga pants. Sherry didn't have on make-up, her short blond hair still dripping wet from a shower. If I didn't know better I would accuse her of trying to seduce me. Hell, maybe she was. She smiles at me as I walk in.

Her apartment was big, with a nice view. A 42in TV sat in front of a white sectional sofa, a glass coffee table between them.

"Nice place ya got here," I say removing my shoes, before plopping down in the corner of the sectional.

"Thanks, Leon helped me get it."

Sherry disappears into the kitchen and returns with an ice cold beer. The woman knew what I liked.

"I have a pizza in the oven too."

She was trying hard, but she really didn't have to. I wrap my arm around her shoulder and pull her close as she put on a horror movie. It was twisted I thought, but she loved the damn things. We finish up the pizza and spent the evening joking around and watching more horror films. She turns to me and kisses me. I carry her to bed and we fuck. She claws at my back and screams my name, I feel numb. We come, and she cuddles onto me, I just lie there staring up at the ceiling fan as it spins.


	2. Chapter 2: She's not my real girlfriend

A couple weeks go by. Sherry and I start to hanging out more, but no word from Piers since that day. I had been texting him, and he's been ignoring them, which made my blood boil. Things must be good with Chris. I decide to head to the gym to lift some weights and hit the bag for a couple hours to take out some aggression. A black wifebeater and a pair of black and white Adidas track pants, my hair pulled back. All the usual people are here today. I say hey and get on with my routine, stuffing my gym bag into a locker.

I put my earbuds in and start my workout playlist. Slipping on a pair of black weight lifting gloves, I set up my bar. Lying on my back, I do a couple reps before feeling eyes on me. Setting the bar down, I sit up and look around, just my luck. Across the room stands Chris motherfucking Redfield. We stare at each other, sizing one another up, he smiles. The BSAA had a gym on site, why the fuck would he come to this one? Out all the fucking gyms, he chose this one. It's not even close to his apartment. I crack my neck and force a smile back, mine not looking so friendly. I lie back and continue my set.

No, I won't fall into his trap. If I go over there and start shit, I will be doing exactly what he wants. I wasn't punking out, I was playing smart. If I attack him here, I will get kicked out of my gym and he will run and tell Piers. I'm not as dumb as you think, Redfield. A shadow creeps across my body, I sneer. This motherfucker is stepping to me. I sit up and lock eyes with him, removing one earbud.

"Christopher, to what do I owe the pleasure," my voice dripping with bitter sarcasm.

"How are you, Jake?"

He smiles, the tone of his voice friendly.

"Look I know you're not here for small talk. What the fuck do you want?"

"You're paranoid, Muller. I am just here to work out. Besides its rude not to say hello to someone you know."

He was pushing it, but it was true. There was no way he knew I was going to be here today.

"Well you said hello, now if you'll excuse me I am done here."

I stand up in his face, having to slightly tilt my head downward to keep eye contact. His smile was pissing me off more, but he moves out of the way. I was letting him win this little mental mind game he was playing. Bumping him with my shoulder as I walk passed. I make my way halfway across the room.

"Oh, and Jake," he calls.

I turn around to address him.

"Leave Piers alone," his voice was stern like he was talking to one of his soldiers, the friendliness gone.

This fucker was really coming at my head. I laugh and turn back around.

"I mean it, Muller. The next time you try and contact him our next encounter won't be so cordial."

I decide to ignore his threat, putting the earbud back in my ear, I wave him off. Score one for me. I hit the bags longer than usual, picturing Chris' head in its place. Finally feeling satisfied the punching bag steadies itself, as I take a drink from a water bottle. I wipe sweat from my forehead and head to the locker room. Cutting off the iPod, and wrapping up the headphones, I slip the device in the gym bag, pulling out my cell phone in its place. I check the messages, seeing I had a couple from Piers.

_Chris is looking for you. Please don't tell him anything._

_Jake, I really meant what I said. I do miss you._

I scoff at the messages. How dare he ask me for anything, how dare he tell me he misses me. If things were as bad as he made it seem, why the hell was he staying with him? Why wasn't he with me if he missed me so damn much? Then there were a couple messages from Sherry.

_Hey, I know you're at the gym, just wanted to text you good morning._

_I am making eggplant lasagna tonight. You should come by._

Sighing, I rubbed my face and tossed the phone back in the bag. Just as I am about to walk out, Chris steps in, I try to make my way passed him, but he stops me.

"Look, Redfield, I'm not on that ok? You two deserve each other."

My statement seems to appease the brute, because he moves out of my way. I wanted to whoop his ass so bad, but that's what he wanted, so I get in my car and drive home. Dropping my gym bag on the floor, I make my way to the bathroom and take a shower. After I get out, I stare at myself in the mirror, hair dripping onto my shoulders. Using the towel to dry off the strawberry blond locks, I leave it draped around my neck. There is a knock on my door. I put on a pair of sweatpants and answer it. There stood Piers with a backpack hung over his shoulder.

"Can I help you," I ask.

"Can I please just come in?

I step aside and let him in, closing the door behind him.

"He came in the apartment accusing me of all kinds of things. I know you didn't say anything, because you both are unscathed. I can't take it anymore. He drinks all the time. Chris just isn't the man I remember."

I can't help but smile to myself. Serves the fucker right, should have never left me in the first place. I never treated anyone the way I treated Piers.

"I don't know what you want from me, Nivans," I say playing dumb.

He walks over to me and wraps his arms around my neck, burying his face in my chest. I damn near melt to the touch. I missed it, but my arms hang loosely at my sides. If he thinks that I am just that waiting around for him to come back, he was in for a rude awakening.

"You can stay in the guest bedroom. You know where everythin' is so help yourself. I am goin' out and don't plan on returnin' until the mornin'."

Pushing him off, I make my way to what once was _our_ bedroom and close the door behind me. As much as this hurt, this was what needed to be done. I'm no one's doormat. I get dressed and put a few things in a small overnight bag. When I leave the room and grab my keys, Piers is sitting on the kitchen counter waiting.

"Who is it?"

His question makes me laugh. Where did he get off asking me who it was?

"What does it matter?"

I'll entertain this for a moment, then leave.

"Damn it, Jake, don't play dumb! Who are you fucking?"

Piers had always been jealous of my relationship with Sherry. He tried to play off his paranoia by over compensating with confidence, but he was so self conscious.

"Sherry."

With that I start to walk out. He rushes after me and grabs my arm.

"Please don't go."

That pissed me off. I turn around and snatch my arm from his grasp.

"Where the fuck do you get the nerve to ask me to stay? You fuckin' left me, Piers. Was I supposed to wait around for you? No! That ain't me. Fuck you!"

Tears well up in his hazel eyes and it feels like daggers to my heart. I regret the words, but it was the truth. He drops his gaze like he gave up. My heart tells me to stay, but my head tells me to leave. This is exactly what he deserved. I leave. Gripping the steering the wheel tight as I drive to Sherry's I fight the urge to turn the car around. Picturing Piers in a crying heap on the living room floor hurt just as much it hurt the day he left. I try to push the images from my mind and I turn up the sound system. The vibration from the bass line make my mirrors shake.

I pull up in front of Sherry's building and linger in the car longer before going up. My favorite doorman rolls his eyes at me and I give him a sarcastically cheery hello. He buzzes me in and I make my way up to her apartment. She answers the door and jumps at me with a happy squeal, her arms wrap around my neck. I chuckle and hold her waist as I shut the door behind us with my foot.

"I missed you!"

I don't reply. She pulls back and looks at my face.

"What's wrong?"

I sigh and toss my bag on her couch.

"It smells good in here. Never had eggplant lasagna."

This was my way of telling her to mind her business in a nice way. She takes the hint and cheerfully saunters into the kitchen. Sherry was one person that knew me quite well. There was a time I loved this woman, but when we stopped talking I disappeared. I know that broke her heart. What broke her heart more was when she got the news that Piers and I were together. I had expressed interest in the sniper one night while we all hung out. Him and I snuck off together and had angry sex in a bathroom stall of the restaurant we were in. Come to think about it, that's the reason her and I stopped talking in the first place. Talk about irony.

I zoned off as she explained the dish and nodded my head absently. I often did this when she spoke. It's not because I didn't care…ok that was part of the reason, but my mind was preoccupied. Knowing that Piers was back home just ate at me. She could tell I tuned her out because she stopped talking. The look on her face was the look she gave me when mad.

"I'm listening."

"No you're not. I know you, Jake. Your mind is somewhere else. Just like it's always been."

Busted. The blond woman turns her back to hide her upset expression.

"A lot of shit is messed up right now, Sherry."

Her shoulders drop as she sighs and turns back around.

"It's fine. It's not like we are together."

"Sher, it's not like I'm not enjoyin' spendin' time with you."

"Jake, it's fine. We're both just using each other. Let's face it. We need to stop acting like we're not."

That threw me off. I thought her feelings were genuine, made me feel less of a dick. I nod in agreement.

"Simply passing time together," she adds.

Something about that brings the guilt back up. Sherry wasn't using me. I was using her. It was apparent in her tone. Averting my eyes, I stare at the counter and she continues to cook me dinner. What the fuck am I doing?


End file.
